There are people who do not want to have kids.
Are you surprised to hear that?
I have read or heard about that severally. I have seen elderly people say they never wanted kids. In fact, an elderly neighbour of over 30years never had kids.
One day while we met outside, she looked at my child and admired her.
“She is adorable. You lot are trying I never wanted one. I can’t give them the life they desire”, she said.
“One has to do what they can as a parent. I do not think I owe them an arm and a leg as a parent”, I responded and laughed.
She told me that every child deserves the best.
I simply agreed with her and we ended the chat and parted ways.
Like I had said, she was old, possibly in her 70’s and not so well but those were her views about having kids. I had known her husband when he was alive. I admired how they held hands and walked side by side each time they were out.
If I were to have this conversation with a younger person I would have argued more. We would have discussed further in details.
In my opinion, it is a great idea thinking of giving kids the best.
Like if you can do that, why not?
They are yours and they deserve it and more.
However, one can only give what they have. This implies that you can give the best of what you already have.
For instance, some families can afford holiday to any destination of their choice while some can only afford a quality family time to a local eatery or park.
Do what you can please. Be happy and contented.
I believe they are no set rules for parenting and these kids do not come with manuals🤣
While these create beautiful memories for kids and are needed I do not think it makes any child better than the other.
Kids will develop well, play and be creative regardless of luxury.
On a different note, I met someone at work who had a very different view regarding why she wouldn’t want to have kids.
She publicly mentioned it while we were all talking and having a laugh. I approached her later as I wanted to know more.
She believes she can’t look after a child. She thinks she wouldn’t have their time.
Her mother had her and left her with her granny while she pursued her career. She didn’t have any bond with her mum and had only lost her granny some years back.
According to her, she knew she would not be bothered with having a child to care for and all that. She was only 22years old and was preparing herself for sterilisation.
Sterilisation will means she enjoys her life freely without any fear of pregnancy that could lead to birthing babies.
Let me not bother you with the details of our chat. This young girl’s mind was made up.
Is it possible that her mother has failed her?
If her mum were there for her would she had reasoned differently?
Unfortunately, I can understand why some people have personal reasons why they wouldn’t want to have kids.
Yet there are those who do not think about the kids they already birthed.
There are those that simply have babies believing that God gives.
There are those that believe that relatives, friends or the society will help raise their kids.
This world we live is in truly great. I wouldn’t say unfair.
*****
Why this story?
Be a good parent. Even if that is the only thing you are good at.
Be the best you can.
Those dependents of yours rely greatly on you
Live for them
Model for them
Be there for them
You have a responsibility
You are their influencer
You are their first school and foundation in life.
We need a better society filled with individuals with good heads on their shoulders. Do your bit please🙏
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Let’s grow together
Viviensvoice