Last Updated on 14/02/2015 by Vivien Ayinotu
I ran into an old friend the other day in a function. In my opinion, she was and still the type of person I would describe as a nice and kindhearted woman. She was gloomy and her mind seemed preoccupied with some personal issues. I kind of observed her for some time and later asked if she was alright.
She shook her head. I gently said to her, “whatever it is, can you at least keep your head straight?” She looked at me,”Vivien you will not understand”, she said to me.In my mind, it is not that I do not want to know what was bothering a friend but I found it to be in appropriate as we were in the midst of people and I did not want her to go ahead and voice her feelings out loud.
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So, when she began to tell me how things were so were so rough for her I simply held her hand and lead her out of the room. Moments later, we were went to a more private section in the building where she poured her heart out to me. The story range from family issues, pressure at work place, wanting to get a better job but for some personal reasons not able initiate the step at the time, to name a few.
For me, the family one was the most important because so many things can go wrong and at any time but you still have to go home everyday and home should at least be a peaceful place you look forward to. At home, she has issues with her partner; who would not like to help out with child care, up-keeping of the the house and above all still expects so much from her.
Did I forget to mention that the pair are blessed with two lovely kids? Yes they are that lucky.
She went on and on. I inquired from her how long she has been able to put up with all of that, how she has tried handling them and whether a family member or a close friend has meddled. Then, she told me how numerous interventions, how some lasted for inly a day and the rest were rather fruitless. Enough heard in regards to the family squabbles already, so I gave some piece of advice and tried to let her understand how she can repeat certain things she had already tried out but with a more different approach.Some greater piece of my advice I am not going to disclose here.
As per the workplace problem, I tried to reason with her in the sense that when you are working, you spend a great deal of your time at work. More so, when we find it that challenging and dislike it.Then it becomes a problem and our emotions and other essential aspects of our lives suffers. To worsen it all, she felt that she stuck in her current job and cannot tell how soon she is likely to get a different job.We explored her circumstances,weighed her options and I made her understand that she has options. “You can achieve this and many more, all you need to do is to set your priority, make out time, be focused and in due time;sooner than you can imagine you will live your dream”, those were my words to her.
Most importantly, I repeatedly told her to be prayerful.By maintaining close communication with God through prayers you are not alone.I encouraged her to try and be strong for herself and if she can, wear a face that tends to imply that she has everything under control.Besides, there are a lot of things one can still be grateful for in any given situation. I can tell that by the time we have talked this far that her mood had already enlightened. She was pleased with the conversation.
Mmm… we were still in a function remember? So, we walked back into the room and joined others. I can tell I missed a bit on the agenda of the function but I was fulfilled to have spent a reasonable time with a friend.
