Year: 2014

Happy Man

Last Updated on 01/12/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

Met a lovely and humorous elderly man.

Photo credit: flickr.com

He made jokes and I laughed

I enjoyed watching him as he chatted with the kids who were playing

Then a bus gradually approached

A lady came by and I realised they were together

‘He is nice and lovely with kids’ I said to the lady

‘He has no family…’ she replied in soft tone

Little do I know he had no family
How cruel life can be sometimes

To a man who seem to be full of life

Laughing on the top of his voice and playing with the kids

Help Another If You Can

Last Updated on 07/07/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

We need to understand that no one is completely complete on their own. 
The essence of having each other can never be overrated; be it at home, place of work or study.
That is why we should seek honesty in whatever we do.
There are people with large hearts but think they have to act otherwise because of an ugly encounter they had.
We should learn from all situations but shouldn’t let the bitter ones be a yardstick for our character.
Nevertheless, still believe that there are people out there with good intentions.
And you will find them.
Do not assume that all have evil minds.
Treat others well and expect nothing less from them.
That should be your guiding principle.
Assuming we all have the interest of others at heart and make life worth living for them.
Won’t the world be a much comfortable place for many people? 
For some, they already have a lot of trouble to deal with and your kind approach or warm gestures will make a great difference.
Do not make an already difficult situation worse; Knowingly or unknowingly.
If you can’t help people in your own little way, please do not make them sigh, shed a tear or get hurt.
They can still live being hopeful that one day all their troubles will be gone with the wind. 

Taking Photos During Christening

Last Updated on 31/05/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

Photo credit: stpeterslist.com

It was a friend’s child christening and I was opportuned to cover it. Hey! Don’t mistake me for a professional photographer yet. Camera was ready, mobile by the side and all were set for work. Lo and behold the Priest made a brief introduction and mentioned no snapping of any sort till he is finished. Did he just said that was the kind of look we had on our faces but I said to myself maybe he actually didn’t mean it.

To think of it, I have witnessed lots of christening and to be honest my parish priest do encourage photographs so I see nothing absolutely wrong with it. With that in mind, I pretended not to have heard this very priest. So when he concluded the mass and was about to begin the event of the day I started taking pictures not wanting to miss any part. He warned sternly that he doesn’t approve such. I then lowered my hand in an angle he wouldn’t notice me and my flash were turned off. Yeah! It worked till someone else snapped and he almost stopped the occasion, it was as though he couldn’t control his temperament but he then paused and told us the reason behind his no snapping policy. 
According to him, christening is a spiritual   birth and an act which should be considered sacred. He finds it displeasing to see how people see it as a fun party; where they take pictures and send off to the Internet or to show off. He urged us to reason with him and simply take a few photos with him when he has finished. 
Well, I kind of reasoned with him and that was very thoughtful of him. He Made some good points but I and my colleagues want to take pictures like we usually see in other christenings and for record purposes too and so was it. Unbeknown to us, one of my friend’s relative who sat at a different section recorded the whole event. Tada! By the end of the day we had  ‘the pictures’ and lots more, no offence though. 
  
If I may ask pls, what is your opinion in regards to taking pictures duringx a child’s christening? 
P.S Hope you had a great month? May the next month bring you favours. 

Ring on the last finger.

Last Updated on 10/04/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

I went to get some chicken from a poultry shop and succeeded in having a nice chat with the sales personnel. At first, it was hard work for me to locate the shop because I was looking for a fresh or possibly live one, it was my first time there after about 6 years ago; I was there with someone. 
On sighting the building and it’s unique yellow painting and drawings, I suddenly knew it was the particular shop I had in mind, after been to couple of other shops and asking after this very shop. 
On reaching there, there were varieties of chicken  I could choose from. The guy helped me made a good choice and admired the ring I had on my finger. We got chatting and he asked for the significances or my cultural interpretations of wearing rings on different fingers. ‘The index finger is for singles or students, third is for engaged people, fourth is the marriage one while the last one is for widow/widower. As for the thumb, I am not so sure what it stands for, maybe for native doctors’, those were my honest answers. We both laughed, especially in regards to the last bit of my explanation.

Photo credit: weheartit.com
It was then that I asked him to tell me why he had a band-less ring on his last finger and I made interesting discoveries. He said that in Morocco where he hails from, parents usually give a ring of luck to their children; to guard them, when they want to leave for a foreign land and in his case it was his mother who gave him the ring.
I was pleased to hear that, in a way that it melted my heart. I actually felt home sick although am not from Morocco. In reality, it got me thinking about the attachment of people to where they originated from and how they so much cherish it , irrespective of how they fare where they found themselves.

At the end I said to him, ‘I hope the ring continues to bring you luck’. I suppose he enjoyed the chat too.  I was going to ask him more about his Country but then I was only there to get some meat, so, the meats were neatly cut and packed and off I go.

P.S  We will like to know if you have a special meaning for wearing a ring on a particular finger or at least, your cultural perception of  it. Thanks in advance.

Hope For Countries In Crisis

Last Updated on 14/03/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

We were in a gathering and as time went by I seemed to be disengaged from the chains of activities on display. I was basically staring and smiling; when need be although completely drawn into the the conversation of the people behind me. At first, I thought they were disturbing but moments later I eventually listened more attentively to them.

They consisted of three group of men and were obviously Africans and I understood their vernacular too. They chatted in loud tones, laughed and argued not minding not paying much attention to those around them. Infact, their attitude clearly showed ‘join us if you wish or you can simply ignore us’.

Crisis in Ukraine

Their discussion comprised global political issues, wars and crisis. They talked about past and current situations in different countries like Ukraine, Russia, Syria and the rest of them. To me, it sounded more like news update and they all seem to be varsed in the topics they discussed. They mentioned Putin and how he has been handling the ongoing situation in Crimea, Ukraine and couldn’t wait for Sunday’s referendum. In addition, they mentioned how the US system and UK economy might be affected.Names like Gaddafi and Mugabe were on their lips and they later narrowed down to African countries and discussed Nigeria in particular.  They talked about history and I enjoyed every bit of it, how Nigerians have been handling politics for the the past twenty years and the richness and unique of their oil and gas. They seemed to know a lot, when one comes up with a point the other will either criticize with a handful of facts be it positively or otherwise.

As they talked, the youngest among them painstakingly added that issues in Nigeria are so dreadful with so many churches in every nook and cranny of the streets yet no evidence of a christian or a caring nation. To my surprise, he punctuated his intense talk by saying that he doesn’t even pray any more.

It sounded like a bombshell to me but neither of them dragged it any further as they kept on chatting about the menaces in different places. I was then distracted and went off with a friend. If I am asked, it is of no good to us living a life without prayer because without God we are nothing. Amidst adversities, there are so many things one can still be grateful for or we can even pray for turnaround of situations, perhaps that can even be a time we need prayers most.

Obviously, we live in a time filled with economic meltdowns and hardship worst still, coupled with countries fighting within themselves and with another but we should not lose hope. We can pray for ourselves, our leaders  and our countries and especially for all the countries in distress around this time, asking that they live justly and peacefully.

Fostering Good Behaviour Among Kids

Last Updated on 24/02/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu
‘I don’t know what you are saying’, the child replied and looked away. She asked him again ‘do you want to become a Priest? ‘I don’t know what that means.’Oh! Sorry, I mean, do you want to become a Rev Fr? Before then the child’s uncle who was standing right beside smiled and said ‘he wants to be an Engineer. 
No….the little boy then replied. Priest means same as Rev Fr, the woman corrected the child who in a striking manner said ‘ but you didn’t say Priest, you said Appraised. They argued while I watched from behind. At the end, the woman told him not to tell people especially, adults they did not say a thing particularly when the words sound very similar. She went further to tell him that it shows lack of respect though she was still able to give him a pat and let him go and play.
Meanwhile, the child’s uncle was all smiles as if he was showing off a smart genius nephew, I guess he is, though he went off and didn’t get to observe the last attitude teaching session. At the other end, the woman was generally talking about how nowadays kids talk to adult. Obviously, she was surprised about the way the boy insisted that she didn’t say Priest. Besides, it was quiet loud because I heard it, maybe the little boy is a grammarian in the making. Who knows? 
It made me recall an incident that occurred in a friends house when I visited last week. The lady had previously warned her kids not to play around the kitchen being that she was making lots of dishes and wouldn’t want any form of accident. Who wouldn’t do same? 
So, the girl was chased by the brother she ran into the kitchen and it happened to be same time her mum was dishing out some foods, turning around, she almost slipped. In an automatic manner, she spanked her girl on the back. I was a bit surprised because she didn’t fall, the dishes were intact and that was a loud spanking. 
I turned to the little girl who then simply went and stood at the doorway, she didn’t look like she was going to burst into tears like I expected rather in the next couple of minutes she went off and continued playing but didn’t come near the kitchen again. 
‘I thought 21st century parents don’t smack kids,’ I asked. ‘Oh! Not me, I do, when need be. They should know you are their parent and not their friend. They need to he disciplined, or else by the time they  get to their teens you can hardly talk to them let alone correcting them,’ was her response.
Disciplining kids is very important as it lays a good foundation for them to build on later on in life. I am a huge fan of good attitude. I think the ladies did well as long as the goal is to inculcate good attitude into children for a better and a greater future generation. 

No Good Friendship Without Love

Last Updated on 14/02/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

Good friends are hard to find but when you count yourself lucky to have at least one of them, do keep them. Sometimes, we might not be continually in contact with them but the fact remains that whenever we do, it feels so evergreen. It creates a sound state of mind as people understand and take you for who you truly are, without much questions or concerns for gossip.

Love is such a beautiful thing that we cannot talk about friendship or companionship of any sort without making reference to it. It drives us to do things willingly for the welfare and happiness of others. No wonder the bible has so much teachings in regards to love.

Drawing strength from the story of St Valentine, especially during his days in the prison and the friendship he had at that time. The story mentioned he had lots of visitors and many threw flowers into his cell window but amongst them were noted the daughter of the prisons guard, who visited him more often and helped him to keep his spirits up.

Unfortunately, we seem to live in a time where for some reasons most people are not genuine in their dealings with people, it is either they are with you for some benefits or they simply can’t be honest with you, yet they still want to be close and fit into the friend category.

Despite all these, I still believe there are some nice people out there and I  hope you are able to find that person that can be your friend even when the whole world thinks you are so wrong and deserved to be alone. We all need someone to help keep us going particularly in hard times, when we are all by ourselves and would do with some companionship. For some people, they simply decide to be disconnected with the world but that doesn’t mean that when eventually reached they would back out, instead they will forever remain grateful you did. Besides, those are the times to prove we truly care for someone because when we are doing so well and bubbling there are friends of all calibre in all nook and cranny.

As other remarkable days are celebrated so is today being celebrated. So show some love to someone, appreciate those that have made your live colourful in any way. Obviously, couples and lovers celebrate this day but it is not only meant for them. Ignore the fact that these days many ideas are overrated, you can mark Valentines day with family, an old friend, a colleague;anyone that thinks well of you.

 P.S. Happy St Valentine’s day Friends. May your hearts be filled with love of God and love of man. Cheers.

Coming Together As One.

Last Updated on 27/01/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

Photo credit: prayinggodsword

I am delighted for having attended the “Ecumenical worship service for christian unity 2014” which took place at an anglican church in my neighbourhood. It was announced in my church and those who can make it were urged to come to, if for nothing else to at least represent our parish.

It was my first time in that church,as a matter of fact in an anglican church. When I got there, I met the first set of people who were from my church(catholic) and few members of the host church(anglican) who were running around to see that the day went well. Moments later our priest arrived and gradually the empty seats were being occupied. I admired the magnificent decoration and heavenly atmosphere.

The host Vicar welcomed the congregation, we were comprised of; Catholic( 2 parishes), Anglican, Reformed and Methodist churches, five different parishes were present. It was wonderful having all the churches in the area come together for such a unity service.

Meanwhile, over the years I have heard that the catholic and anglican ways of teachings are very similar to each other and had to testify to it that day. They were so true be it in the hymns, penitential act, readings and bidding prayers. Moreover, I loved the response during the prayers, it goes this way-
….Gracious God, hear our prayer,
    And in your love, answer. 
I equally noticed the prayers were based on the eight millenium development goals, which addressed the major global issues.  On the contrary, there was no creed nor communion; not that I expected them anyway.

The sermon was very inspiring as the Minister encouraged us to be good followers of christ. He admonished us to promote Gods name and the church although he spoke against people who worship a particular church rather than God himself.

As he preached, a feminine voice was heard from behind though what she was saying was quite unclear. It happened that the voice kept disturbing us. She interrupted him and thereby gained audience. A man followed her immediately who without doubt wanted to drag her out but had to let her talk as she kept saying she wanted to say something-

“I have been through a lot in life, I know God.
I am Linda….As she talked she demonstrated, letting her hands go as free as they can.
I have been through ups and down
I will tell you you this:
Never give up and always pray!
Never give up and always pray!”(I was startled when she said that, some of the congregation were nodding like it was a divine message).
Waving her hands she said “God bless you all”
She made sign of the cross twice before she was led out.
The congregation applauded her.

Later, the Vicar ended the sermon by saying “United we move forward against divisions and promote christianity by the unity of all christians.”

To sum it up, I had a wonderful experience being that I learnt a lot that day and from my point of view, I believe that christianity is about coming together to worship God.

Dementia And The Bird.

Last Updated on 16/01/2014 by Vivien Ayinotu

Having been already informed about his condition, I knew I was going to be very careful and most times repeat myself to him. 
On  reaching there, he was dressed in an outing attire and was so full of life. Few minutes later, whistling by a bird at the corner drew our attention. One of my colleagues who seem to know more about birds went closer and I followed her just for curiosity sake. She was asking him for the species, who gave it to him, how long he has had it and what he had named the little creature. 
We all got chatty. .He said, it was a Christmas present from his son and he can’t think of a name yet and simply calls it baby. Mmm… How am I supposed to know a mere bird can be called baby as well. We all laughed. I admired his sense of humour. 
It struck me that it was a present. I thought to myself, won’t he be doing some more cleaning because of this bird, so much noise and distractions but then I viewed it in a more positive and healthy perspective and concluded that his brilliant son has bought that to make him more attentive, keep him busy and also keep him company or for some other reasons.

He was pleased to have us around. He talked about his housing issues and how he called an ambulance three days ago when he felt so unwell. He looked much stronger and said he felt much better. If my guess was right, he enjoyed our company and wanted us to come more often. I can tell because loneliness is friend of no man.

When we were about leaving, we mentioned our names to him once more and made sure he locked the door before we headed for the stairs.

The next day, I ran into him in an event and he recognised me, I was impressed though he didn’t remember my name, which I reminded him of.

At this juncture, I want to get us acquainted with the condition.

Photo credit: Daily mail.
Dementia is a syndrome associated with an ongoing decline of the brain and its abilities. This includes problems with:memory loss,thinking speed,mental agility, language,understanding and judgement.

It usually affect people above the age of 65, though on fewer occasions could have an early onset.

Symptoms include:

  • Increasing difficulties with tasks and activities that require concentration and planning
  • Depression
  • Changes in personality and mood
  • Periods of mental confusion
  • Difficulty finding the right words
  •  Hallucinations i.e they may see or hear things that other people do not or they may make false claims or statements.
  • A catastrophic reaction i.e when put in circumstances beyond their abilities, there may be a sudden change to tears or anger .A common symptom of dementia is for dementia sufferers to deny that relatives, even relatives in their immediate family, are their own relatives.
  • Disorientation- this occurs in the later stages of the condition, whereby subjects may be disoriented in time (not knowing the day, week, or even year), in place (not knowing where they are), and in person (not knowing who they and/or others around them are).
On the contrary, with appropriate management and care, they lead an active and fulfilled live. 
Photo credit: NL Group

Conclusion
Aging do come with certain conditions and dementia seems to be very popular among them. Do try and treat the elderly with much care and concern, you never can tell what condition(s) they are battling with.

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New Year:To Be Resolute Or Not.

Last Updated on 11/01/2023 by Vivien Ayinotu

We rarely talk about the new year without mentioning the huge ‘new year resolutions’. It is a good idea to be fully prepared for a new year; being hopeful that undoubtedly it has good things in stock for us. This could be likened to the way we are willing to accept and welcome new people or babies in our lives.

Recently, I had a chat with a friend about the new year;what should be expected and the likes. The chat was going on well and all of a sudden she said in a very careless tone  ‘I no longer do new year resolutions.’
I was going to ask her where did that one come from,  in the sense that I don’t know how such an idea got into her head let alone hearing her say it.
“Sorry…”  She laughed at me and repeated herself. She added that it is childish. Gone are the days when in the beginning of a year people make lists of things they want to do; lose weight and quit smoking, nothings changes it is the same like in the past days and past year. She really made herself clear.
I had to listen to all of that despite knowing I had heard enough. However, I knew it would get to my turn and that she would have to take in what I was going to say.

In my opinion, such lists are not applicable to everyone. Cliches like that are overly rattled and not paid attention to. Besides, when we talk about the new year resolution it doesn’t necessarily mean that we are about discarding all our previous ways of life or former ways of doing things.

In fact, towards the end of a year, I like doing a total reflection of the whole year; how I have fared, whether I achieved some set targets, unexpected favours, difficult situations and how I handled them, some nice people I met, people who influenced me, people who challenged me-those that made me put in more effort at some point, personal improvements…the list is endless. This is my kind of list and obviously with this, I usually have some provisions for some new year resolutions because there are things I would like to carry along, some modified while others dropped. They equally groom one properly as they attain certain life milestones.

I gave her some examples that were applicable to her and at the end she agreed with me but said she still don’t call them resolutions. I didn’t argue further since the problem now is the word and not the act. We never used the word ‘Resolution’ but settled for making some ‘modifications’ and ‘new decisions’ where necessary.

By the time you know it, we were back to our new year yarn; what we would love to achieve in it and how we are going to go about it.
I know she wouldn’t be the only one with such perception of the new year resolution albeit, there could be other reasons why people ditch resolutions in the beginning of a year. However, I would like us to see the need to make certain life adjustments when a new year sets in- no mater how little they are.
Lastly, I was pleased we had that chat within the first week of the first month of the year and I know this is very likely to be your first time of reading this post in the first month of the year. Did I mention that my friend is neither fat nor smokes yet the first set of resolutions she could think of was to lose weight and to quite smoking.
Plan well and achieve your dreams friends.